I love that the above quote by Alice Walker showed up when it did the other day = there are never any accidents eh?

This last week i was blessed to hang with a dear friend...  We had some good time to connect and catch up with one another's work, our art and spirit path...

It's always good to be with an ally... a sister who shares their authenticity... to truly understand some of the 'same stuff' we deal with as beauty-makers on a daily basis... it helps to know that we're not alone keeping on... keeping on the path as we are continually called...

We talked about 'wounds' and particularly... how our core wounds, can continue to inform our lives... and, how they can run silently in the background like some insidious screwed up program... broken and sickly... barely going though still operating...  I sometimes call it the 'default' that kicks in or triggers you when you least expect it... playing with + hampering our self-worth...

And....... it's interesting how stuff can align too... It's like when we bring awareness to something, deeper awareness and healing comes right in the moment... After our lovely time together that afternoon with new awareness shared between friends... back home,  while i was mindlessly scrolling through my photos, i stumbled on an old portrait of me someone had sketched in pencil.... and, there it was... that old sketch - not very big... very simple, looking back at my soul...

I was drawn to journey within this drawing which took me back to the time in my life when it was drawn - in my early 20s...  A time when i was searching for meaning in my own life... of autonomy and independence... finally getting out on my own to find my own way.  Though at the same time, i was a walking zombie of confuzzed wounded-ness - not knowing who the heck i was...

I journeyed back even further to re-visit some of those places ... woundings in this life-time and even further back to a past-life awareness that had come up for big healing along my path years previous... I know now that those 'agreements' that i made as a child are not even my own agreements...they're someone else's - who didn't know themselves either... who had been wounded too... who were just living their life the best they knew how... i had forgiven that remnant long ago... 

It made me realize just how much 'all of that' narrative that was mindlessly served up to me within daily, traumas big + small - i sucked up like a sponge, like all children do... and those old stories stayed 'there' deep within my sensitive being... as set-programs continuing to run on default from that moment forward... 

Revisiting this place brought deeper awareness as, i also stumbled on the above quote by the wonderful + wise Alice Walker... where profound healing or how i like to call it... 'another layer of the onion has been peeled away' yet again... i have let a lot of crap go... and the 'story' that goes along with it... that is no longer serving me... it's all gone back to the Mother that she lovingly composting + transforming back into 'sami' light... 

"Healing begins where the wound was made."
--Alice Walker

I give thanks and gratitude to my sister-friend for her wisdom + caring ear the other day and my friend who sketched that lovely portrait of me... and i know why i kept it... and, i so wish i could remember her name - which has left me... (when it comes, i'll certainly give her the credit she is due here)... i love this sketch and how it was rendered = ie., no chair!...

I still remember clearly the afternoon she drew it... and gifted it to me later that day 40 years ago - somehow she was guided... she knew she had captured something healing for me... (her original is to the left) and...

The other 'version' i posted at the top of this page, i had some fun artistically 'reclaiming + retrieving' back yet again another beautiful piece of my soul that has been held within the love + the safety of our Mother's arms all this time.... perhaps a 'new self-portrait of the being of light i truly am.... 

Thank you my dear friends... i love you...
brightest, weaver x (((o)))

​This last summer, i was at an outdoor event where i was asked to offer ceremony for a group of people... it was being held in a beautiful space in the verdant forest here on the west coast...

As folk were gathering, i was in complete awe of the forest beauty in front and all around me... and, simply enjoying the moment as i waited for folk to settle in for the ceremony.

Just being there was so healing... rich in fresh cool air during one of the hottest days of the summer...

About 15 feet away, right in front of me was one particular very tall and ancient cedar tree... an old soul 'grandmother' who greeted me seeming pleased we were gathering to create sacred space together - that 'we' were actually acknowledging this sacred landscape...  It was good to connect as i continued to wait... she welcomed me and was curious...

One man walked by and around the old tree and looked up at her as he was chatting with his friend... I overheard him say...

"Wow, that's a big one eh?... I wonder how much it's worth on the market?"
​
His comment startled me though didn't surprise me either...

I sighed quietly and shook my head in disbelief to myself knowing his perception of this grand old tree, who was probably 200-300+ or more years older than he, was only seen as an 'object' or a 'product' that held monetary value and nothing else...   He didn't seem at all awed by this old soul's beauty, presence or deep knowledge she held from being rooted in the earth for so long.  His mindset was just what could be earned or taken from her and our mother.

My heart aches as our culture continues to perceive our blessed earth mother as a resource to be used and abused... where she is our source... for, we wouldn't be here without her!

Sharing some thoughts that arose from being a part of a group that explores the power of 'vibration' and 'sound' together...

This morning, i was quite stunned, moved + honoured (with a group of dear souls) to witness through sound, just how much heaviness good people are carrying so deep within them...

The sounding exercise offered was a uncomfortable one for most of us... we were asked to simply 'sound' and go with it...

What i particularly found interesting was that, no one expressed their 'sounding' of joy or love of life... though chose or were moved to sound a wide range of emotions of deep sorrow, anger, frustration and hurt - even chaos and indifference... The soundings were definitely a strong expression and perhaps a release on many levels... we all found it a powerful time together - almost un-nerving perhaps..?

I couldn't help but wonder also, what i witnessed, was perhaps, just how much of that heaviness the overall collective of the world is carrying..... the world is very weary + so sore.... i know we're all feeling it on so many levels...

Perhaps this 'sounding' offered some healing to the world...? 

i feel there is hope... as part of my path + daily practice is to re-member the tools i have been taught + gifted.... that our blessed Earth Mother, Mother Gaia, Pachamama, the beautiful, living + breathing be-ing she is... is always here for us... despite all the heaviness she endures - she keeps on going strong...

I trust + embrace that the ratio of what's going right with our dear Mother outweighs that which is not right... she knows who she is and has endured for thousands of years + will continue to...

Our earth mother offers us a simple, yet powerful sacred gift... and, we have forgotten this sacred gift... She reminds us to re-member to simply let go of the heaviness, the darkness that keeps us bound... She lovingly receives it with love, transforms + composts it back into 'sami' light... She's good at taking our shit - our own heaviness... and, that is a good thing and, it's necessary for the world... i believe that is part of a balance + the sacred relationship or partnership with her, we have lost...

We can choose to feed her as she feeds us... to return to the ancient beautiful reciprocity of 'right relationship' as one with our earth mother - to connect again with the land(s) that hold + sustain us = to acknowledge + celebrate she is our Source, not a resource...

For, we wouldn't be here without her! ...
(i invite you to think about that for a moment)... x (((o)))

ps... i will write more about this 'heaviness' + how we can simply release it again soon... 

There's always time to say thank you... 
One way i offer my gratitude, especially for our beautiful earth mother, is to offer a 'flower despacho' - which is a gift of prayer in mandala form... I will take flowers + other found earth-bits (like leaves, sticks, pine-cones, etc) and mindfully 'blow' my prayers/intentions through the flowers + bits and place in a beautiful arrangement on the ground... and then, allow it/let it go to compost on + into the ground, so my prayers become part of/embodied with her...
An offering like this doesn't have to be elaborate = keep it simple + free!... x (((o)))

This month i joined a new group offered by a wonderful musician, here where i live - something of which i'm very excited about.

​Going to the first session this week was wonderful as i found everyone very much interested and very keen to explore sacred sound and how to learn overtone chant... 

A number of years ago, i was thrilled to be initiated in overtone chanting by Matthew Kocel, an overtone chanter + sound healer from Vancouver, BC... 

It also felt really great to be a part of a group of like-minds... and i am particularly excited to explore with others about 'sound healing' that i've been engaging with for many years... i particularly get excited about being in a circle with others where we can work with sacred intention (dreaming) together 'as one'... as i so believe in the power of numbers who gather together.   I have experienced this a lot over the years from offering sacred drum circles and trainings - as 'sound' musician + sacred drummer...  

At our first gathering, Leah offered us sounding circle Invitations... and i hope to journal more about my experience being a part of this wonderful and special group...

• “All of life is vibration.” – Albert Einstein
“Sound connects us to the vibratory nature of all things.” – Jill Purce

I do agree and have experienced in my own life that yes, 'all of life is vibration' and 'sound connects us particularly through our vibrational emotions...  Emotion = Energy and thus does create our life from the present moment forward... I love the quote, "Tomorrow never comes" because 'tomorrow' is not now... 

I have learned through the sacred drum that when i play my drum, i can only be within the present moment of 'now'... and the sound vibrations i sound through my drum go out into the world and return ten-fold... so, a big part of my practice is to really be mindful of where i'm at when i drum or better yet, how i 'feel' + what i'm 'vibrating' through my emotional state in the present moment... I have learned that we can only create our lives from the present moment of now forward... So, i ask, 'Where are you or what are you feeling right now?'...

• Each day become of our own breathing...
Take a few minutes and breathe consciously listening to the sound of your inhale and the sound of your exhale... I'm always amazed as to how much i hold or am aware of how tight my breathing can be - especially when i'm too busy or stressed... i used to love circular breathing on a regular basis... at one time years ago, i experimented with 'Rebirthing' - which i found to be a powerful experience and very healing...

• Working with intention... and what i like to call 'dreaming'.... 
“I am aware of the vibrational nature of my environment” (or) “I am aware of the vibrational nature of all things through sound” or others... Connect with your intention before you begin to make sound." Again... my practice is to keep coming back to how i'm feeling (what is my vibrational resonance)?... Since living here on Gabriola, i've been deeply moved with getting to know the animals and birds who live with us so closely here on the island - it's been such a joy to meet them and learn how sensitive they are... i wrote about a profound experience i had meeting a beautiful doe, a young mother deer who connected with me one day in our yard.  I was astounded as to how we deeply communicated together, just through the resonance of our eyes... I shared this experience with the group...

• Overtone chanting, toning and humming...
Take five minutes (or longer :) and overtone chant and/or hum and/or tone (links below will be helpful)... i'm really excited and looking forward to deepening this practice for my self and my own healing and expanding my own sacred voice... 

• Wondering...
If “all of life is vibration” … what does this mean? How do I live and relate – day to day – as though all of life is vibration? With my family and friends? In my community? In my work? With my possessions? Allow your own listening, and the idea that sound connects us to the vibratory nature of all things, as portals into the question (note: I invite you to energetically carry these questions with you – not to analyze or assess how you live (i.e. not in the head!) – but rather as gentle companions to an embodied, in situation inquiry and exploration).

• Noticing and journaling...
Notice if there are any shifts or changes in your daily life: They may be subtle and they may seem insignificant. Keep a journal – writing, drawing, both – of what you’re noticing.

• Sharing... Each week in the Circle we will take 10 minutes (give or take) to briefly share our experiences...

Some useful links to share... on overtone chanting and healing power of sound with renowned sound healer, Jill Purce...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cUjV3SWXFiU&t=3s
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=guANw889h84&t=349s
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-y6g7X6esQU

I birthed my first drum over 25 years ago with my first teacher in Celtic shamanism.  It sure was an amazing and growing experience.  Back in the early 90s, i was part of a sacred healing circle of about 15 or so women where together, we all birthed the same type and size of shamanic drum - a 16-inch Elk...

At the time, when i was apprenticing, i was asked to help out with that women's drum birthing workshop - being in charge of care-taking the hides... which meant making sure the hides were soaking well overnight in my studio-space bath tub.   The next day, i brought them all back to our workshop space for us to birth our drums in ceremony.

Back then, i was vegetarian and for me, to handle huge soaked Elk hides was a tad un-nerving, to say the least - especially after they had soaked all night, weighed a ruddy ton!!  They also smelled horrible and felt sooo alive!  I learned that when an animal has been chosen or chooses to transition it's life to become a sacred drum - that, during the sacred act of birthing a drum, they are reborn to be in service to our blessed earth mother - to now be her steward as her sacred voice, heart-beat-pulse... learning this helped a lot for me during this time in my life...

When i got back to the workshop space with the wet hides, the teacher asked me to lay them all out on top of a large tarp and told all the women to choose one...  As i was putting them out, each woman quickly chose their own, where, very soon only one hide was left... i didn't get to choose - my drum's voice/hide had been chosen for me!

Learning how to pull a big drum with a very thick Elk hide (as a full-wrap around the hoop) wasn't an easy task - on top of sitting on the floor to do it... Our teacher also didn't really show us how - she basically walked around the room dropping us each an instruction booklet that had come along with the drum supply-kits she had ordered from Cedar Mountain Drums in Oregon... I have to admit, i did find it challenging to birth my first drum having to read the steps line-by-line... I remember sweating a lot that day = definitely a labour of love...

​As we all came to completing our drums, the teacher did come around at that point to help us with the final pulls to make sure the strong thick hide was completely wrapped smoothly around the frame.  I was quite happy to have the help at that point as my hands were so sore and tired...

While the hide was still wet, when i held it up with the light shining through, the shape of a huge bird in flight revealed itself right through the middle on the back side... Though, when my drum was birthed, as she dried and came into being, a new spirit emerged forward in the front ... i saw the amazing old face of an old white grandmother wolf... she was stunningly beautiful and so present... and has been a part of my special drum ever since her birth... One time, years later, a beautiful Metis elder asked to sing a wolf into my drum as she knew that spirit was very present as a part of my sacred drum... i was deeply honoured to be witness as she sang her sacred gift into my drum... grandmother wolf is still very present guiding me...

The whole process of birthing my own shamanic drum was life-changing for me and, i have been deeply blessed to have had the opportunity to share and pass on the gifts that were shared with me - to assist others to birth their own sacred drums and continue to.  My sweet drum has taught me a lot over the last 25+ years and continues to... Through her, our blessed earth mother continues to share deeper teachings to share with others and my students...

What i found amazing back when i birthed that first drum was, how amazingly strong and resilient rawhide lacings are when wet and dry...

Rawhide dries very rock-hard strong... and when i look at a few of my lacings on the back side of my drum, i am still amazed as to how strong yet vulnerable and fragile they are... and so are we... my own 'heart strings' have been good teachers...

These lacings are still holding the voice of my drum very strongly - even after 25+ years! 

This, my first drum i birthed... my beautiful grandmother wolf drum, my dear friend and ally continues to reflect to me my own inner heart strength and the fragility of all life... She teaches me that it's okay to be vulnerable and that i have the power of choice within any given moment to resonate who i truly am as a be-ing of light and love...

I stand within this present moment... to offer my deep appreciation and gratitude for the gift of the sacred, healing drum - and all that she continues to teach me... I also give many thanks to my teacher who shared the gifts she had been given, to me...  thank you grandmother wolf for being a beautiful teacher...
​in deep munay of love + light, weaver x (((o)))

​photo @ right...

An actual photo of heart strings (tendons) inside the human heart...

It is known that the heart strings can sometimes break after a deep emotional trauma causing the heart to lose form and, as a result be unable to pump blood effectively... You can literally die from a broken heart...

Oh, how fragile, yet so strong we all are.......x (((o)))

​Did you know that drumming is good for you?... it's actually a very healthy practice for body, mind and spirit....

Lately, i've been thinking about rhythm and also the benefits of drumming... and so, wanted to share some things i have learned over the years... 

"If you could see your DNA, you'd see what your inside rhythm looks like... You are rhythm... You are made of flesh, bones - and rhythm... Rhythm is what keeps you alive."   --Mickey Hart

Within our bodies, we have the rhythm of breath, the rhythm of our heart and the rhythm of our blood pulsing through our veins.  We are nothing but rhythm within and out...

Sometime when you have a moment... just sit quiet and just listen to the diverse rhythms around and within you... listen to the rhythm of a bird's song... the drumming of a flicker woodpecker... a squirrel's chatter...  the ticking of the clock on the wall... the crackling of a hot fire... the constant passing of traffic on the freeway... the swishing of the wind swaying the branches of a tree or in the grasses... the honking of a truck's horn... the gentle drops of a spring rain... the gentle in and out of your own breath...  that annoying drip on the kitchen faucet...

I have to giggle sometimes when folk tell me that they can't or don't know how to drum... i aways say, "of course you do! ...because the first sound you ever heard was your own mother's constant heart-beat - that's all you knew and heard while in her womb all that time... it's the first thing you learned... that constant pulse was all you knew! - so, yes... you know how to drum - it's the very first thing you were taught and know so deeply!" 

Everyone knows how to drum - everyone who has a mother... a grandmother and our blessed earth mother...

I love this, the below powerful teaching by sister frame drummer Layne Redmond... who wrote the beautiful book, When the Drummers Were Women  >>

​“It is often said that the first sound we hear in the womb is our mother's heartbeat.  Actually, the first sound to vibrate our newly developed hearing apparatus is the pulse of our mother's blood through her veins and arteries.

​We vibrate to that primordial rhythm even before we have ears to hear. Before we were conceived, we existed in part as an egg in our mother's ovary. All the eggs a woman will ever carry form in her ovaries while she is a four-month-old fetus in the womb of her mother.

This means our cellular life as an egg begins in the womb of our grandmother. Each of us spent five months in our grandmother's womb and she in turn formed within the womb of her grandmother. We vibrate to the rhythms of our mother's blood before she herself is born. And this pulse is the thread of blood that runs all the way back through the grandmothers to the first mother.

We all share the blood of the first mother - we are truly children of one blood."  
-- Layne Redmond

Outside of ourselves are endless universal rhythms all around us... every 365 days our blessed earth mother revolves around father sun... while every 28 days, grandmother moon revolves around our mother earth... ever 24 hours our earth mother rotates (spins and dances) on her axis... since the beginning of time, these cycles have intertwined and are the background against which our universe exists...

Another great quote i love...

"Rhythm lives within everyone, and it's not something special.  People don't have to have professional musical talents and techniques to express their rhythmical spirit.  Everyone has a rhythmical sensibility within and how they express it differs from person to person.  Rhythm permeates everyone's life.  It is in everything we do, we see, we feel and it is within the rhythms of our bodies, as well.  Rhythm is a fact of life."  
-- Arthur Hull

The voice of the drum is the bridge to the spirit realm... The pulse connecting us to our blessed earth mother's heartbeat... and the circular shape is that of the hoop of life.

The earth is round... the moon is round... the season's turn 'round and the stars and planets are round... 

A circle is one of the most natural forms found in our physical universe... it has no beginning and no end...

"Blessed am I... Holy am I... 
I am the infinite within myself... 
I can find no beginning... 
I can find no end... Oh, this I Am!" 
-- traditional chant

Since the beginning of time, peoples have gathered together in circles in ceremony and ritual fashion to celebrate and to pray in community.

Participating in a drum circle creates community almost instantly... as soon as we begin to drum together and we entrain together... we become one -- we become community... we also have fun, we sing, dance, play music and socialize... and, heal together...

Drumming together mindfully and in a sacred way - by acknowledging our spirit and helper-spirits and our ancestors - those who have come before us also connects us in a very special way... we embrace purpose and again "one-ness" of "like- mind"...

Drumming together is also just plain fun... when we drum together, we can let down our guard, relax and let go thus reduce stress and worry... the sacred drum also clears the way on many levels... drum vibrations and sacred sound massage our bodies, our head, our brain and calms our mind... and also creates physical exercise... 

"Music washes away from the soul
the dust of everyday life 
--Berthold Auerbach

A while back, a medical study done by a team of MD's using control groups and blood tests show drumming together boosts the immune system. 

It's now been proven that stress is a cause of 98% of most disease.  Recent biofeedback studies show that drumming along with our own heart beat rhythm for at least 15 minutes a day alters brainwave patterns (increasing alpha) and dramatically reduces stress...

So, drumming actually "meditates" us!

A recent medical research study indicates that group drumming boosts the immune system. Published in the January, 2001, issue of Larry Dossey’s Alternative Therapies the ground-breaking study was performed at Meadville Medical Center’s Mind-Body Wellness Center, by a team of MDs using control groups and blood tests.

Led by well-known researcher, author and cancer expert Barry Bittman, MD, CEO of Meadville Medical Center’s Mind-Body Wellness Center in Meadville, PA, the study shows that group drumming actually increases cancer-killing (NK) cells which help the body combat not only cancer but other viruses, including AIDS.

According to Dr. Bittman, “Group drumming tunes our biology, orchestrates our immunity, and enables healing to begin… When our hands connect with a drum that vibrates with our energy, vitality…and unity, we become whole again.” Dr. Bittman’s weekly radio program, Mind-Body Matters, is syndicated nationwide on NPR.

This new medical research follows recent biofeedback research showing that even brief heartbeat drumming can double alpha (a light meditative brainwave) and reduce stress. We now know that stress depresses the immune system and has been linked to nearly all diseases.

Drumming has also been used successfully with Alzheimer’s patients to focus attention, with war veterans to end trauma, with addicts in recovery from drug and alcohol abuse, and with prison and homeless populations to enhance self-esteem. Progressive corporations like Motorola, AT & T and Levi Strauss have drummed with middle management to promote team spirit-building.

Widely published research also indicates that playing musical instruments increases kids learning abilities. This appears especially true of instruments which can be played intuitively, like the drum.  Qualitative studies have shown that drumming enhances right-brain functions such as intuition and creativity.

“Dreams are the way the unconscious speaks to the conscious mind. Ritual is how the conscious mind speaks back. One-sided conversations are unhealthy for the psyche, which craves response. New thought writings on addiction suggest that we are hungry, that our souls are starved because our lives are devoid of ritual.

“We keep trying desperately and unsuccessfully to feed this hunger with food, drugs, sex, alcohol, work, shopping, gambling, etc. Drumming is one of the most accessible forms of ritual because drumming along with our own heartbeat is so natural. It calms, centers, and reconnects us with our deeper selves.”

"The Drum is the Great Spirit's favourite instrument. 
That is why we were given  a heartbeat. 
-- Mano, Navajo Elder

Did you know that you can 'drum your life into be-ing"?...
​Learn how here >>

Sometimes there are no words......... 

Sometimes there are only moments of sweet beauty.........

The other day, I was standing outside my studio, busy sanding a couple of wooden handles for some rattles i was making...

I prefer to do that work outside to keep the dust down inside the studio... It's also nice to be out in the fresh air - take in what's around me in our big side-yard, up in the sky and the trees... listening to bird-song, (whom i'm still getting to know since moving here a year ago)... Including getting off my butt for a bit too... as i sit waaay too much!   Someone told me the other day, that sitting for too long has become the 'new smoking' = yikes......

​Most mornings, of late, we've had a lone, wild turkey (earth eagle) hanging out in our  yard, gobbling away for no apparent reason, it seems - for, who knows what... though, i wonder if perhaps, he's attempting to call his buddies up the hill to join him... he's not been very successful...

​I was quite focused on my sanding for a good 10 minutes or so when, i suddenly felt a presence... that i wasn't alone.......

I looked up from my work and, there she was... holy wow!... a beautiful, deer doe, just inches away, standing there, quietly looking at me... 

At first i was a bit startled as i wondered how long she had been there, looking at me... perhaps, patiently waiting for me to notice her....

I softly said hello to this dear soul as my heart lit up.... She didn't move... her amazing big beautiful eyes drew me right into her sweet be-ingness... tears were streaming down my cheeks as our hearts locked on as one....

We spent quite some time gazing into each other's heart-soul....  I knew i was receiving a huge gift.... it was such a sacred moment.... When our heart-gaze released some...... we continued to connect with each other so close...... we chatted heart to heart for a while longer...   i was moved to ask her permission if i could photograph her - of which she allowed.... she still didn't move....

Not long after, the turkey, who was  still in the yard, unexpectedly let out a gobble... the turkey didn't phase her though.... she simply dropped her gaze from me and began to slowly saunter away... turning back once or twice - offering a couple more moments to connect........

I was so very moved by this deep moment of beauty we had shared... she offered me to really 'feel' such a gift of the heart i haver never quite felt before... i continue to feel very moved by the whole experience... One of the many gifts she gave me in that moment was...... that i know i am never, ever alone......... something was healed within me and my dear heart...

There are really no words to describe this, our beaty-moment together...............

She has since returned to our yard many times... as she is pregnant and about to give birth.... We have seen her lying on the moss down in the yard at dusk and will walk through to say hello.... I am so honoured with much appreciation, to have met my new, sweet friend of the heart... I can't wait to see her with her new babes come through the yard....  

with brightest blessings... weaver x (((o)))

Above, a bit of video i happened to capture when she began to walk back into the yard, after our time together... below a couple more glimpses of our moment together... x (((o)))

Poem

a dreaming...
to drum with our earth mother...

to connect...
be in harmony
is all we seek...

calm balance...
fresh clarity...
to seek resonance, tone, timbre, pulse...

linking up
to be one, once again...
return to source in unity

together with our blessed earth mother...

she seeks us by always
helping us remember...
being there, a constant...

offering support and nurturance...

let's offer our love and hope
with clear, whole, sound...re-connect with her deep heart-pulse...

her rhythm so constant
so strong...

rhythm gives us intent...
she keeps us going

melody is like thought...
be of like mind

harmony is emotion...

begin by giving back...
as one people

one heart, one song
side by side harmonizing...

with our body...
around her body

at one moment...

now!


© 1994  by weaver
photo of chumpi stone © 2016 copyright by weaver


weaver x (((o)))
​

Above video showing the beginnings of our dear windwalker coming into be-ing...
Thank you dear Rick for the video...

Good News!  I've been celebrating - a lot of late!... because dear laughing wolf has found her new voice!

As some of you may know, it was about three years ago or so that this amazing sweet drum accidently fell and her beautiful voice/hide was torn and cracked wide open... i wrote about it in a blog post and again when deeper teaching came for me later on another post...

Part of why it took so long for her to sing again was, it was a bit of a challenge to find a new hide that was actually big enough and thin enough to fit her amazing 27-inch red oak steam-bent hoop...

When i asked the guys at the drum-supplier i work with, if they had any goat hides larger than 33 inches in diameter, they laughed replying that goats here just don't grow that big.... Though, they would let me know if something that large may come in.   They never let me know... so, i thought to myself that perhaps i may not find a hide that would be similiar to what she had before or big enough.   So, dear laughing wolf sat has remained open with no voice for the last three years.  I sure have missed her!

I considered using another type of hide though, it never seemed right... so, i continued to call and ask spirit for her new voice to come - trusting that perhaps one day, it would come.

A few weeks ago, i was back at the supplier picking up stuff for two drum-birthing workshops i had coming up for Vancouver and Gabriola.  After finishing going over the orders, i took a chance and was moved to ask the guys once again, if maybe they might have any large goat rawhides in stock - maybe one?... 

Lo and behold, Francis said he thought they might... and off he went out to their other room to check and.... brought back a large goat hide.  Together, we measured it up... it was real close to the size needed and so, i decided to take it home.

One of the first things i did when i got back was, to lay laughing wolf's beautiful hoop on top of the new hide to see if it was going to fit!  I was elated - it did!

About a week later, with the assistance of dear Joanie, we re-birthed laughing wolf... and, it was a beautiful thing to do together... and i have to say, she sure turned out beautiful... being a part of her new birth was a moving and deep experience for both of us... it was definitely a birthing, that's for sure... 'cause she's one big drum!  It was a big labour of love andi couldn't wait to 'hear' how she came through........

So, on a Sunday evening, the night before the full moon, on November 13th... i was thrilled to re-awaken laughing wolf along in sacred circle with wonderful dear souls here on Gabriola.... i can't tell you the joy we all felt to be witness to her sacred sounding and enlivening in that new-birth moment... it made me realize just how much we have missed each other and to again, begin building a whole new relationship - getting to know one another yet again...  Thank you Colleen for holding the space for us to do that... with much appreciation and joy....

Many years ago, laughing wolf, a beautiful qilaut frame drum was birthed for me - by master drum maker, John Millen of Thunderheart Drums in Baltimore... John is retired now... and three years ago, he was kind enough to share with me how he birthed a drum like laughing wolf... i wish to thank you so much John for your wonderful sharings and for birthing this beautiful sacred drum for me all those years ago...  

with much love to you with hoards of light... weaver x (((o)))
​

Below is a short video to hear her new voice............ x (((o)))

all above photos taken by carol weaver © 2016 copyright - all rights reserved

​"This stone i place here to mark 
​this Singing Moon-Time of Abundance + Passing Within with the Wisdom of Grandmother Wolf... 

May her sacred teachings help me to become more deeply human..."

It's been an interesting time here on Gabriola these last few days as the month of September rolled in...

The crisp scents of Fall are definitely in the air as we move into this next cycle around the wheel... reminding us to think about getting prepared for the coming winter... The Farmer's Almanac is predicting a cold one this year...  One task we managed so far is, to get a couple of cords of wood delivered, stacked and ready  - quite the job to say the least... an opportunity to use those muscles i haven't used in quite some time = holy whoa!

I give many thanks to those Standing Ones, those trees who gave their lives so our home can be warm this coming winter...

This last week showed me some teaching about letting go - when you least expect it... especially with what i had planned for this recent past New Moon... i had journeying circles planned both for September 1st here on Gabriola and another for Vancouver this week - when i travel over for the Luminous Path which is beginning a new round...

And so what came into being was, both circles were not meant to happen... i won't go into the reasons why, other than to say, that each one had it's own releasings for not happening...  

I have to admit i was surprised that both ended up being cancelled... even after some of my own questionings, resistence and attempts to TRY and make them happen, i came to the realization that it was indeed all okay to let both circles go this time... perhaps good ol' Mercury Retrograde had a hand - who knows?

I also had to get over worrying about disappointing those who had planned to come... 

​When i was preparing for these next circles - Grandmother Wolf offered her guidance....She who teaches us about moving from the West to the North... the Teacher with sharp instinct and intelligence... sacred wisdom, the Sage and Elder... reminding us of our dear Ancestors who paved the way for us... gifting us with stamina... resilience... always reminding us of our own knowingness... 

It was the Cedar trees who spoke to me, asking if we could connect together - especially those here on Gabriola, who have been dying since our summer's long dry drought...  

Some folk we have met, who have lived on Gabriola a long time, mentioned that, over the years, the water table on the island has been shifting in response to climate change... confirming the beautiful cedars are feeling it the most...   in the last number of weeks, we have been saddened to witness that a lot of the cedar trees are dying rapidly all over the island...  The fire department was also announcing that they're concerned they are now becoming a fire hazard.

We give thanks for the recent rains that have come... helping to nourish our dry island home, the blessed trees and all her kin...

The English word, 'Cedar' comes from the Hebrew 'Qatar', meaning to smudge... indicating cedar wood was used in purification rituals and cleansing... The smoke of the cedar leaves are very cleansing and clearing of the energy/luminous body and spaces... First Nation peoples have and continue to use the sacred cedar to purify and cleanse in all aspects of life using all parts of the tree for housing, art, clothing, cleansing and ceremony ... The sacred Cedar was also known in many world cultures as the Tree of Life... the 'God/ess' tree... With blessed cedar, draw Earth energy and ground yourself, place the palms of your hands against the ends of the leaves...

So, if our New Moon journeying circle did happen, i was going to invite us to journey with Grandmother Wolf to the sacred Cedars, to simply connect with them and check-in... and so, because we're not meeting physically.... 

Suggested Journey...
​or, create your own...

This is the time of Passing Within... the cycle of Lammas and the element of water... This is the path of the mature adult who seeks to live responsibly and to bring healing... to find enlightenment to become more deeply human...

I invite you to explore this pathway when you wish to understand how best to act when the 'stuff' of life becomes overwhelming... when you seek peace in all ways......

I invite you to face the sacred directon of the West and... with all your senses embrace the colours, the sounds, smells and taste of Fall... connect with the Sacred Waters of Mother Ocean... her life-blood streams... her rivers and lakes... re-membering that 'water-knows-all-water indeed informs all water...

Find a beautiful place in nature you love or imagine where the grand Cedars reside near where you live... with Grandmother Wolf as your guide... She invites you to listen to the birds singing high in the Cedars... 

With Grandmother beside you, ask her to take you on a journey to the place of the singing Cedars... say hello when you greet them... create a sacred space in a circle including the Standing Ones and yourself...

Offer the Tall Ones an offering of gratitude for who they are and the gifts they freely give us.... for we wouldn't be here without the trees... as we breathe them and they breathe us... thank them for sheltering us... for warming us... for cleansing us... and feeding us in many ways......

Sit down with your back to one Old Tall One and connect deeper... again, use all your senses when you merge with her or him... feel the rough bark on your skin.. smell the musty damp moss in your nose... look up and embrace how s/he embraces you.... and listen deeply for a message s/he may share with you....................... take some time with this............................

 When you feel you have received your message or sense of one... hold the essence of that message-gift sweetly cupped in both hands in front of your heart center... gently blow with the spirit of your breath into your hands three times.... feel it... know it... receive it.... and then mindfully place that essence into your heart... giving thanks....

Now, offer your gratitude and healing for those Cedars who are passing within.... You're invited to hold a vision of their healed state as if it has already happened within this present moment... while holding this vision-dreaming, use all your senses of what that would feel and look like - drive it with your strong emotion resonance and vibration... know this is happening right now... dream it into being....... hold it strong for as long as you are guided....

When your journey feels complete... return back to where you began.... again, give gratitude for this blessed opportunity... close your sacred space and come back into the room or where you are...  close your own physical sacred circle-space and make note of any teachings or guidance you received during your journey...  also know that deeper awareness may still come later...

If you feel called, offer ceremony with a gift or despacho to the Sacred Cedars near you and/or hold them within your own mesa or bundle...

I welcome you to share any insights you may have received in the comment below... so we can share with each other as we do when we gather to journey... to share our wisdom and the knowings from Grandmother Wolf and the Sacred Cedars...
I thank you for connecting in and caring ... for they thank you too...

Wishing you many bright blessings...
with much love + light.. weaver x (((o)))

below... the blessed sacred Cedars of Gabriola....... 
photos by weaver x 

Above post, shamanic journey meditation + photos by weaver © 2016 - all rights reserved...
- the 20-minute journey drumming track, 'riding the wave' with rattle can be purchased + downloaded at cdbaby.com - from the album, 'journey with laughing wolf'
​- thank you for supporting my work... with appreciation, weaver x (((o)))