I love that the above quote by Alice Walker showed up when it did the other day = there are never any accidents eh? This last week i was blessed to hang with a dear friend... We had some good time to connect and catch up with one another's work, our art and spirit path... It's always good to be with an ally... a sister who shares their authenticity... to truly understand some of the 'same stuff' we deal with as beauty-makers on a daily basis... it helps to know that we're not alone keeping on... keeping on the path as we are continually called... We talked about 'wounds' and particularly... how our core wounds, can continue to inform our lives... and, how they can run silently in the background like some insidious screwed up program... broken and sickly... barely going though still operating... I sometimes call it the 'default' that kicks in or triggers you when you least expect it... playing with + hampering our self-worth... And....... it's interesting how stuff can align too... It's like when we bring awareness to something, deeper awareness and healing comes right in the moment... After our lovely time together that afternoon with new awareness shared between friends... back home, while i was mindlessly scrolling through my photos, i stumbled on an old portrait of me someone had sketched in pencil.... and, there it was... that old sketch - not very big... very simple, looking back at my soul... I was drawn to journey within this drawing which took me back to the time in my life when it was drawn - in my early 20s... A time when i was searching for meaning in my own life... of autonomy and independence... finally getting out on my own to find my own way. Though at the same time, i was a walking zombie of confuzzed wounded-ness - not knowing who the heck i was... I journeyed back even further to re-visit some of those places ... woundings in this life-time and even further back to a past-life awareness that had come up for big healing along my path years previous... I know now that those 'agreements' that i made as a child are not even my own agreements...they're someone else's - who didn't know themselves either... who had been wounded too... who were just living their life the best they knew how... i had forgiven that remnant long ago... It made me realize just how much 'all of that' narrative that was mindlessly served up to me within daily, traumas big + small - i sucked up like a sponge, like all children do... and those old stories stayed 'there' deep within my sensitive being... as set-programs continuing to run on default from that moment forward... Revisiting this place brought deeper awareness as, i also stumbled on the above quote by the wonderful + wise Alice Walker... where profound healing or how i like to call it... 'another layer of the onion has been peeled away' yet again... i have let a lot of crap go... and the 'story' that goes along with it... that is no longer serving me... it's all gone back to the Mother that she lovingly composting + transforming back into 'sami' light... I give thanks and gratitude to my sister-friend for her wisdom + caring ear the other day and my friend who sketched that lovely portrait of me... and i know why i kept it... and, i so wish i could remember her name - which has left me... (when it comes, i'll certainly give her the credit she is due here)... i love this sketch and how it was rendered = ie., no chair!... I still remember clearly the afternoon she drew it... and gifted it to me later that day 40 years ago - somehow she was guided... she knew she had captured something healing for me... (her original is to the left) and... The other 'version' i posted at the top of this page, i had some fun artistically 'reclaiming + retrieving' back yet again another beautiful piece of my soul that has been held within the love + the safety of our Mother's arms all this time.... perhaps a 'new self-portrait of the being of light i truly am.... Thank you my dear friends... i love you... brightest, weaver x (((o)))
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This last summer, i was at an outdoor event where i was asked to offer ceremony for a group of people... it was being held in a beautiful space in the verdant forest here on the west coast... As folk were gathering, i was in complete awe of the forest beauty in front and all around me... and, simply enjoying the moment as i waited for folk to settle in for the ceremony. Just being there was so healing... rich in fresh cool air during one of the hottest days of the summer... About 15 feet away, right in front of me was one particular very tall and ancient cedar tree... an old soul 'grandmother' who greeted me seeming pleased we were gathering to create sacred space together - that 'we' were actually acknowledging this sacred landscape... It was good to connect as i continued to wait... she welcomed me and was curious... One man walked by and around the old tree and looked up at her as he was chatting with his friend... I overheard him say... "Wow, that's a big one eh?... I wonder how much it's worth on the market?" His comment startled me though didn't surprise me either... I sighed quietly and shook my head in disbelief to myself knowing his perception of this grand old tree, who was probably 200-300+ or more years older than he, was only seen as an 'object' or a 'product' that held monetary value and nothing else... He didn't seem at all awed by this old soul's beauty, presence or deep knowledge she held from being rooted in the earth for so long. His mindset was just what could be earned or taken from her and our mother. My heart aches as our culture continues to perceive our blessed earth mother as a resource to be used and abused... where she is our source... for, we wouldn't be here without her! |
i wish to acknowledge with gratitude that i live, work + play on the traditional and unceded territory of the Snuneymuxw First Nation...
my blog writings...i'm a creative soul choosing to walk softly on our blessed earth mother's back... more here... Spirit Art Frame Drum Available by weaver…
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